Monthly Archives: September 2003 - Page 2

things that make you go hmmm

I went to Staples this afternoon to ship an item I sold on Ebay. While he was making the UPS label, the desk clerk asked me “What are the contents of the box?”.

So with my best poker face, I told him “Fifteen pounds of crack cocaine.”.

He raised an eyebrow, and asked “Oh really?”.

So I ceded, saying “No, not really. It’s 20 broken optical mice.”. He took that answer, and went on about his business of preparing my box to ship. It does make me wonder though, how easy it really would be to ship anything I want via UPS or whatever. Not necessarily crack cocaine, but you know what I’m getting at.

Losing Purpose

It won’t be long and women will no longer have a place in the world. Oh well, at least my cat seems to prefer them.

no, really, you’re kidding right?

Listened to NPR on the way to work again this morning. All kinds of horrible things happened around the world. A judge ruled that Boeing is culpable for the 9/11 attacks (?!?), a homicide bomber in Iraq injured six Americans and 21 Iraqis (some sort of new math going on there I’m sure).

The news item that really grabbed (pardon my verb) my attention was about the Catholic church. Apparently they’ve agreed to pay out some 85-odd million dollars to the victims of priestly indiscretion. Now the kicker here is that in the past they’ve wanted to offer reparations to the victims, but have not had the cash (so they say). This time, they’re going to sell off some real estate, but they were also going to “more agressively pursue insurance money due the church for these payments”.

Now that floored me. Does the church carry dirty-old-priest insurance? Maybe it’s just a general alter boy coverage policy? What sort of insurance company provides this sort of coverage? It boggles the mind.

No More Sounds of Silence!

It has just come to my attention that Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel have re-united for a concert tour. A concert like that is worth driving insane distances for, and worth the usage of vacation time. There is only one official date scheduled for California. I can’t wait to see where/when the other dates are gonna be set for. I better start pinching pennies for this one. Jerry and Elizabeth, are you guys gonna be game for this too?

dreamwerks

Last night was one of those nights where I woke up alot. I also dreamed a lot. I’m not sure if I dreamed more than normal, or if I just woke up often, thus I remembered more dreams? Either way, I had a really interesting dream.

You see, last night I dreamed that I was just about to finish grad school. In fact, people were already bandying about the phrase “Dr. Heigl”, and I felt that title had quite a nice ring to it. Anyway, I still had one test left before I was actually done with my studies. It was some sort of floofy class like a botanical survey of northeast asia (only with animals too) or something. Now I was suprised by the existance of this test, but my professor had mercy on me, and allowed me a few hours to go home and study before the test.

In fact, he was nice enough to provide me with a voucher to use the public transport system to get home to study. Now the public transport is the interesting part, to me. I went over to a corner gas station that was across the street from the university building. Teathered there was this metallic sphere with four lateral antenna along the equitorial region of the thing. For some reason, almost-doctor-me was not aquainted with these apparati, but a passerby was kind enough to explain. He pointed out one of these thingers already in the sky. It had the metallic spherical part, just like this one, only it also had a parasail portion tied up above the sphere. He gave some basic explanation of the workings of the device, and explained that “it was completely safe because of the parasail”.

So, being calmed about this method of transport, I hopped in and deposited my token in the appropriate slot. Now there had been no windows apparent from the outside of the device, but on the inside, my view was not obstructed in any direction. It made for a very nice view. The thing informed me that it would take me home, then await to return me back to the place where it started. Very convenient, I decided.

Once it took off, the fun began. Since the view was unobstructed, I could see all around me. Did I mention that it was dark out? Luckily, this thinger had headlights that allowed me to see around me.

At first, the ride was really smooth. It rose up above traffic height and floated along, taking towards (I assume) my destination. It moved at a good clip when it was going straight. Maybe 15 or 20 miles per hour? It was very cool, especially when the thing took me over a bridge. It was fun to watch traffic passing under me.

Then we got to the edge of the city and started moving through the country. The countryside was beautiful. Very verdant green (what I could see of it in the dark). The road wasn’t paved and it had big ruts in it where a vehicle had slogged through fairly deep mud. Apparently the deep mud was why I didn’t drive myself home (assuming that I had a car at all?).

Anyway, about that time, I noticed that my particular thinger didn’t have a parasail. You know, that part that made it “completely safe”? Even as I noticed it, the thing started crashing through the underbrush, in slow motion. It even ran over this old lady who was standing next to her car. I was kind enough to pick her up. I was in the process of taking her back into town, when I got stopped by a policeman. Apparently the road I used to get back into town was a “no automated vehicles” sort of deal.

That’s about when I woke up. To tell you the truth, it was a very enjoyable dream, right up to the crashing around the underbrush part. Lots of pretty views of this city, the bridge, the forest, etc. Kinda trippy in its own way.

breaking the seal

When it gets to the point where I haven’t posted in a while, I start saving back inane little posts, waiting for that really good post. The one that will make it worthwhile for me to actually post again.

Well, enough waiting for that. Here’s a worthless post. It doesn’t even deserve post status, really. It’s more of a meta-post.

Speaking of nothing of the sort, I have an extreme dislike for motorola. (: